Graduation Message

This quote was shared by one of the speakers at my daughter’s graduation this past weekend. Smith College invited five speakers, each an incredibly inspiring, strong, and accomplished woman. Most inspiring of all was the class president, whose message was, "You are enough." She also encouraged her classmates to pay attention because the things that inspire us the most might be found in everyday interactions.


What impacted me the most this weekend was my perception of time and the “impossible." As we cleaned out my daughter’s room, we peeked into some of the other rooms on the floor that had already been vacated. One of the rooms we peered into was the exact room we saw five years ago during our Smith College tour. Five years ago, I couldn't not conceive of how it would be possible to afford to send my daughter to Smith, her first choice, never mind her having a private room! But now, in 2024, the “impossible” has been achieved. Back in July of 2023, I couldn’t conceive of how I’d ever be able to do crow pose again. Not only was I in constant pain from a wrist break, but I was also in a splint. While I was very concerned with being able to shower, but the thought of not ever being able to do crow again was definitely on my mind. And this weekend, I was able to pop up into the pose. (Maybe it’s no coincidence that the Airbnb we stayed at was affectionately dubbed "the Crow’s Nest," but I like to think that it also had to do with my dedication to regaining my range of motion.)


It’s hard to believe my broken wrist was less than a year ago! It’s hard to believe that less than five years ago, we as a family were fretting about college applications, affording two kids in college at one time, and having my daughter so far away from me for so long. And now, as it happens, these things are done.


And so, what of the improbability of me healing my current knee injury fully and being able to do child’s pose one day, getting over the cold I have, making it through this heatwave or coldspell, getting past a bout of sleeplessness, or ever coming out the other side of a personal or business challenge? Will this ever be done? When one thing is accomplished, another (or many) arises.


It is possible that sharing this with you will help me remember the next time I think I’ll never make it past whatever it is. I will recall standing in a hallway at Smith in 2019 "knowing" I couldn’t provide my daughter with what she wanted most, and "knowing" a year ago I would never be able to get into crow pose again. How about in 2021, "knowing" we would never eat in a restaurant again or sit in the same room with people who were not in our Covid pod?


Ten years ago, I "knew" I would never get wrinkles, saggy skin, or a menopause belly!
I am selfishly hoping that if I share some of these things I "knew" for sure that didn’t turn out the way I dreaded, or foolishly hoped for, maybe I will remember the next time I "know" something. I will remember that I don’t "know" anything at all. Maybe I will remember that what seems impossible is only impossible until it’s done. And that whatever happens, I am enough.


My big question is, when we “know” something, what does it prevent us from doing? How does “knowing” limit our interactions in this world and restrict our dharma? If Nelson Mandela and the ANC had “known” apartheid would never change, what might have happened (or not happened) in South Africa?


What do you “know” that you are willing to challenge?